Sex & Quarantines

(I was going to title this "Sex in the time of Corona(virus)" as a play on the whole "Love in the Time of Cholera" but then I actually came across TWO different articles with that title. I guess I'm not as clever as I thought, hahah)

These are crazy times we are living in. Seeing the world shut down around me feels like a bizarre dream, or like that Goosebumps episode where those kids find a magical typewriter and every weird thing they write comes true...

So, many of us are in quarantine right now. It can be hard to fight the boredom and eventual cabin fever that comes with it. But have no fear! If you are stuck with a partner, use this as a time to try some of those things you've always wanted to try. If you're stuck with family or with yourself, maybe try some self-care and find out what makes you happy (sexual or otherwise!). Below is a list of some ideas to keep your quarantine exciting.

**First things first, USE PROTECTION. Unless you are in a long-term relationship where you have both been tested, please use a condom. Outside of the usual risks of pregnancy/STIs, we aren't sure if COVID-19 can be passed through semen. However, I'd rather be safe than sorry--according to this study, there are 27 viruses that can be found in semen, including Zika & Ebola. 
SO, err on the side of caution and use a condom. And if you're using latex, remember to always use a water-based lubricant (oil-based lubricants can wear down the rubber, putting you at risk for breakage and STIs!).**

1. Try some new positions/areas of your house

The 'Binding Spoon' position

Check out Kinkly's 'Sex Position Playlist.' You can choose different categories, levels & orientations for your chosen activity. And because I know you're wondering, I already found it--the most popular position is the Binding Spoon. Check it out. 
If possible, try out some different areas of your house. Most people generally use the bed, but what about the couch? Kitchen counter? Coffee table? Do like the movies and brush all your work-from-home stuff off your desk and do it there? Go crazy (but be safe!).

2. Take the MojoUpgrade Quiz

This is one of my favorite suggestions for couples who are just starting out, looking to spice things up, or looking to reignite their sex lives! It is a quiz for couples where you each answer questions on what you like/want from your sex life. You each answer the same questions, but separately. At the end, the quiz will show you both the things you're mutually interested in. And don't fear! If you put down that you are interested in, say, heavy BDSM, but your partner didn't, your partner won't see that! You will only see the things you agree on. It's a really great way to open a conversation about things you might be interested in but never really knew how to bring up. It's also a fun thing just to do for yourself if you aren't super knowledgeable about fetishes and kinks. Try it out!

3. Take a look at TBLOP (The Big List of Porn)

This website has links to websites containing every kind of porn there is--videos, erotica, cams, hentai, chat rooms, etc. Maybe you're new to looking at pornography and aren't sure where to start. Or maybe you have watched every video available on your favorite site. Branch out & find something new.

4. Support small sex-positive artists!

There are tons of sex-positive independent artists out there waiting for more people to notice and purchase their work. There is more to pleasure than amateur porn videos at your desk, folks! Here's a list of some things to check out:

-Toys--One small business toy maker is Funkit Toys--I've followed the owner, Kenton, on Twitter for years. Kenton is a certified sexuality educator and a chef.  He makes beautiful and unique sex toys that he calls "modular sexperiments." His stuff is great (and he's really funny). His toys are very affordable and fun to look at, so take a look!
Another toy maker I follow is Robert Thompson, who makes fantasy-themed toys. Visit his Etsy here, or check out his Twitter page!

-Self-published e-books--There are tons of erotica/romance authors with self-published e-books on Amazon. If you need help starting your search, check out K.C. Bloom (another person I have followed for awhile on Twitter) or Brittainy Cherry (who went to the same high school as me!).

-Art Work--You could spend hours, if not days, on Etsy looking just one category of artwork. Seriously, anything you are interested in, just type it into the search bar and you will find so many results. There are prints, stickers, jewelry, toys, clothing, etc. To start, take a look at the work of PussyGarden, Linolicious, or SexyFoxyShop.

-Blogs--Obviously, you're reading my blog (thank you very much), so why not read others? Here are a few people that I have met through my sex-blogging adventures that you should pay a visit to!

@sextoyspolitics on Twitter: From her Twitter info: "Tired queer sex writer, bird rescuer, former sex worker." Lots of great info in her tweets!

@FeralCarrot on Twitter/website: FeralCarrot: From their Twitter info: Spreading Good Vibes 🌞 | Body-Safe Sex Toy Reviewer | Butt Stuffer "

@_aceinthehole on Twitter/website: Aceinthehole--An Aesexual Sex Blog: From her Twitter info: "Asexual sex writer and aspiring corpse. I am not to be truffled with."

@dizzygirl812 on Twitter/website: ToyMeetsGirl Reviews: From her Twitter info: "Painfully average middle age married woman in middle America, giving you honest sex toy reviews without the bullshit."

@lizsaysitall on Twitter/website: Sexology Bae: From her website info: "A black millennial perspective on sex, sexuality and relationships."

@dirtylovegamesX on Twitter/website: dirtylovegames: From their Twitter: "Nikki & Daniel, open-lifestyle couple seen on @PlayboyTV's show Swing & hosts of Toyride"

Give all of these wonderful folks a follow and some views on their blog and learn something in the meantime!!

4. Try out some toys!

I haven't posted a review in awhile, but I've got tons of suggestions for toys! If you've ever read my blog before, you probably know my favorite toy company is Satisfyer!! You can order their wonderful toys from their website or from Amazon. My personal favorite is the Penguin air-pulse stimulator. For people with penises, they have the Men One, and for couples, try out the Double Plus Remote.
Another great toy to consider is MysteryVibe's Crescendo. It has a smart app so that you can create your own vibrations--how cool is that?! It's also 20% off right now with code 'LOVE2020.'

Outside of these tried-and-true products, you can find tons of others on websites like Adam&Eve, SheVibe, & Jack & Jill. Also, it is likely there is a local sex boutique in your area that would love your business, especially during this time.

For condoms or lube, I highly recommend ONE Condoms. I'm a big fan of the MOVE Lubricant, as well as the VANISH Hyperthin condoms. You could even spend your days locked inside designing a condom wrapper for their Spring 2020 ONE Design Contest.

5. Binge movies & t.v.

My husband and I almost done with the second season of Sex Education, and we are loving it. The writing is fantastic and accurate and hilarious, as is the casting. It is definitely worth a watch.  If you're looking for something a little sexier, might I suggest Secretary. It stars James Spader & Maggie Gyllenhaal, so it really should have something for everyone.

Hopefully, you are all staying safe and healthy. Feel free to send me a message and let me know how your pandemic is going and let me know if you have any questions or would like more suggestions!

Also, I'm currently out of work (which is why I have time to write!), so if you have the means and would like to donate to show appreciation for my writing, you can do that here!


Stay safe, WASH YOUR HANDS, and check in on your friends and family <3