Monday, September 19, 2011

Sex Drives.

As humans, we have some basic drives. One of these is a sex drive. It's a well-known 'fact' that men have higher sex drives than women. But is that true??

Turns out, yes. Men do tend to crave sex more, and not surprisingly, they will take it more casually, often, and without emotional attachment. A psychologist from Florida State University even conducted a study that showed that men get aroused more randomly throughout the day, whereas for women, a situation has to be just right for her to become turned-on.

--About 66% of men say they masturbate (compared with 40% of women). This has gotta be wrong, I think that number is too low.

--Men seem to have specific expectations for the things that turn them on, whereas women are more difficult to figure out (as usual). When showed pornographic videos to gauge arousal, straight men were aroused by straight porn, gay men by gay porn, lesbians by lesbian porn, but straight women seemed to be aroused by all of it!!!

--Church-going women tend to be more strict about sex, where as men going to church doesn't seem to matter.

--Educated women tend to have done more sexually, whereas education levels don't seem to matter in men. This is strange to me as well, I would expect uneducated people to be more sexually involved.

--So why do men seem to be able to jump anything that will let them penetrate them, whereas women can be more picky?? Edward O. Laumann, PhD, a professor of sociology at the University of Chicago, says that it is more sociobiological than anything else. He says that men want to spread their seed anywhere and everywhere, but women are more specific about who they sleep with because they are aware of the possibility of pregnancy. They know they are the ones who would have to carry the baby, and they want to choose someone with good genes who they think would stick around to help raise the child.

--Men think about sex at least once a day. I read something saying that the old, 'Men think about sex 6 times a minute' thing is a myth, which makes sense. How is that even possible, and do they think of anything else? Only about 25% of women think about sex in a day. I'd be interested in finding out what they consider 'thinking' about sex.

--Women like the build up to sex and men just like the sex. Of course, both genders like both of those things, but women like to talk and emotionally connect, but men like to just get it on right away. Women are turned on by reading and seeing romantic/sexual things, and men can just be ready by knowing they'll be getting sex.

--After penetration, men take about 4 minutes on average to orgasm. Women take about 10 or more minutes, if they orgasm at all. As I've said in a previous blog post, the majority of men orgasm every time during a sex act, and not many women do.

--There's not a whole lot that can be done for women with low sex drives. Men have things like Viagra or Cialis. Women don't really have medication like that, and women actually don't respond very well to sexual medication either. Testosterone, which is a key agent in sex drive, works faster in men than women. Hormones are very big in sex drives, and the lack of certain ones can lower it. This is a shame because a study in the journal Obstetrics and Gynecology showed that about 40% of women have some kind of sexual dysfunction, such as low sex desire!!! Sometimes your birth control can be responsible for hormonal changes that can change your arousal. If you think your birth control might be to blame, talk to your doctor.

(WebMD Men's and Women's Sex Drive)

How can I raise my sex drive?

Medications like Viagra and Cialis may work for older men or men with erectile dysfunction problems. These pills DO NOT work for women.

Sometimes pills such as birth control or anti-depressants can lower sex drive. If you are taking any of these pills and notice a decrease in sex drive, talk to your doctor.

Certain foods can boost your libido.

Try new things. Try new toys, positions, situations. Don't always have missionary on Thursday nights at 8 pm after dinner. Have spontaneous sex in tons of different ways, in tons of different places. Try different lubes. There are all kinds of lubes--warming, tingling, flavored, etc. Pure Romance  even sells a lube(x-scream) that when applied to the clitoral area, boosts arousal.

Make sure you are attracted to your partner, and be sure to have lots of foreplay. Try things like watching porn, reading erotic literature or watching a sexy movie. Don't feel ashamed to do these things because it's natural to be turned-on by them. Also, having a low sex-drive is normal, as is a high-sex drive. But if you have one or the other and are not comfortable with it, always talk to a doctor or research ways to tone it down or bring it up. Alcohol can help you become aroused, but be safe, responsible, and never depend on it. Do things you know will put you in the mood.

(Revving up Women's Sex Drive)

What kinds of things put you in the mood? Comment below.